June 22, 2015

Achilles Tendon

One day, while I was running late for school, I had to suffer a major bruise on my right foot tendon. It was a stressful Monday morning; Then, I had to endure the pain the whole day. Nothing can get any worse.

A few days back, when I thought everything was going to be fine. Hope is near and the pain caused by yesterdays' bruises were slowly fading away. I am strong, I am determined to move forward. 

I cursed that one Monday morning. I got wounded, I fell in love again. 

Weak. Unable to move fast. Always trying to get over the week, the days, the seconds. Hoping yet never seen. Always trying to be loved back.

I will not say things like "I hope someone falls in love with me, like how I fall deeply in love with someone else too", I find it cheesy and ironic in both ways, it's just a selfish thing to think of love in the context of an idea. Instead, "Love because you do. Love because you just. No expectations, no favors."  You have to learn how to buy your own bandaid, without hoping that someone else will. 

I keep on running, causing a lot of pain to my right tendon. When I arrived at the classroom. I heard not much of care but judgments; to my being late and my being slow. But they never noticed the blood on my right foot. An evidence that I tried my best to run as fast as I can.

Down the rabbit hole, I fell. But it wasn't wonderland. It's an underground full of illusions, assumptions and all the things I find impossible. I saw myself, mad as the mad hatter.

Then it occurred to me; Perhaps, that's why Achilles fell to the ground.

Love, Patricia